break up day of 4th

Today is our break up day of 4th..u always told me that, past ady past ady, but u know stg? “ iIt is important to retain past mind, imposisble to hold onto present mind, and imposisble to grasp future mind.” This is become there is no such thing as a “ mind” that can acquire or control things. Laa..this is not the point!!! I want always be with u ..not oni go go mei mei!!i hope we can couple again. I dun hv any reason to grab u bek , I jz want u happy always. My heart still open for u as u said. But today jz the 4th day, my heart already a bit gone. Seriously. U told me that I must find a good guy. No, u are the best in my mind in my heart.i dunno how to speak gentle, isnt ur excuse to leave me ? I’m so hurt. U always told me that u love me so much and I believe that u will not told me be gentle a bit . coz my action had been fixed, in ur inner heart I think u will think tat jessica ur action or language I don’t mind coz I love u . Am I rite? Don’t say no. there are no one know more bout u..my word no sweet but all the words are froming by my inner heart. From heart to heart. I know u wont cry again. But sometimes, I really miss u especially after we break up. We keep contact..slowly, we will lose our contact. Will u ? I promise, if u really get the disease I willing to do ur partner until u finish ur life journey. U don’t say tat I’m great. Actually, I’m not becoz I love u.u don’t say tat it will hurt me deeper coz I had promise u whenever sad or happy we must share together. U don’t cheat me tat u didn’t get the disease after the report come out coz u will hurt me deepest than everything except my parents.i’m just wan to give u happy days escape from pain of treatment. I don’t want u suffer alone. I can do it. If u really do tat, do not beside after u be ghost. I wont bother u , I wont forgive u. sorry, lap tears 1st.here the blog had been a prove for us .today u go out with friends, I hope ur emotion can be recover but I’m sure the pain still there. U are so strong! Thank u baby.1 month or 2 month? But anyways I jz hope u can beside me as fast as u can. I dun wan others. I’m sorry that I always make u angry. Sorry.nowadays, I’m oni know u angry for my goodness and argue can make ur emotion drop. In this few month ,are u sure we wont lose our feeling to each other? (cry) I don’t wan others guy, I wan u oni. And that day I sent u the sms: “ when cold u gv me blanket; when sleep who help me cover blanket; when hungry who buy food for me; when sad who consolation me; when cry who lap my tears; when shopping who paid for me and the main is when down who give me hope and encourgement?” u tell me, wat can I do now? K7 faster bek to my side pls..God, why a good couple can be but the problem occur between us? Why god?